When I'm in charge, things will be different

Working for a state agency means that many of the features that I always thought were intrinsic to an office are not in evidence. Like the communal coffee pot and the occasional all-office-burrito-lunch. Not so here, apparently. To remedy this, the office has several "clubs" in which folks who wish to participate may pay and then enjoy the perks of the "club." The coffee club, for example, is $5, which was used to buy a coffee pot and coffee. Those who paid are allowed to drink the coffee, but those who didn't pay are supposed to forage for themselves.

I never took this system very seriously (although I did pay my $5 for coffee) until this week. There is a "birthday club" which charges its members and then buys birthday cakes for the members on their birthdays. Cakes which are only to be consumed by paying birthday club members. This week, the cake was purchased and left still sealed in its box in the kitchen with no note, to be eaten later. Well, somebody was heating up their lunch and must have thought--"Hey, cake!" removed the shrinkwrap and cut themselves a slice. So then many folks who came into the kitchen to heat up their food must have thought--"Hey, cake! I wonder if it's available? Well, somebody already had some, so it must be. I'll have some too." So when the birthday club members came back later to enjoy their cake, it was well massacred. Much angry emailing and muttering and gusty sighing resulted, all of which I enjoyed since I have the cube closest to the kitchen.

All of which has made me realize that I am a cake socialist. Who brings cake, leaves it out in the kitchen where everyone can see it, and then tells folks they can't have some?

Down with the cake bourgeois!